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Dear Taylor and Liam,
Please know that I love you. Do not let my extreme anger and frustration at the pair of you lead you to believe that I do not care for you. It is because of my love for you, and your future spouses, that today I will finally lay down the law.
I am sick and tired of the messes that are your rooms. I am tired of constantly asking you to clean these rooms, only to discover you on the computer, downstairs watching TV or out with friends.
Liam, you have until Thursday at 8 pm to clean every square inch of your room...under the bed is to be cleared out, every shelf on your entertainment centre and bookcase are to be sorted and dusted. Your floor is to be swept and swiftered. Your bed is to be made EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. If your lego is not in your lego container (which should contain only lego) it will be thrown out. If your Yu-gi-oh cards are not picked up and a contained home for them found, they too will be thrown out. Note that I threw out both your Simpsons versions of Clue and Life. Since you did not care to pick up the pieces and keep them together I figured you no longer had an interest in these games. Please do not look for any of your CDs, DVDs or Playstation games. As you can not be bothered to put them back in their cases I have found a new home for them. You will get them back when all the cases are found. If ever again, I find a bunch of discs lying around they will not be hidden they will be thrown away. Unless I want them for myself. Please make sure you return my box set of Freaks and Geeks to the livingroom. On Saturday morning you can wash your walls. Feet, Liam , my love, do not belong on walls.
Taylor, due to the insane amount of homework you get but never seem to do until the last minute I am giving you until Saturday at noon to finish your room. I realize you have a birthday party to go to on Saturday evening, so please note that if your room is not spotless you will not be going to this party. I will keep the purchased Chapters gift certificate for myself. Taylor, I am dismayed and disgusted by the amount of food wrappers I threw away this morning. There must have been about 40 or so. Since you are not allowed food in your room I am extremely pissed off. I hate this sneakiness. I threw a lot of paperwork out, I assumed a lot of it was Grade 6 stuff but I did come across some Grade 7 things that were supposed ot be returned, oh, maybe the first week? I have left you the garbage bag to go through should you be missing anything of importance. The following is required of you: Please go through all your jeans. You tell me you only have 3 pairs that fit you, but I put away a good 15 pairs today. Instead of taking them off and throwing them on the floor- leading me to believe they are just dirty and therefore are rewashed and the whole vicious cycle starts again- if they are too small please fold them neatly and put them in the provided "no longer fits" basket that can be found on your closet floor. What? You didn't know you had a basket for this very reason? Well you do, it's just that you have so much assorted junk in it that its original purpose has been lost. You are also to empty all the boxes that your things were put into 4 weeks ago when William redid your floor. It has after all been FOUR weeks and there is no reason why your room can not be cleaned. Especially since I had given it a thorough cleaning while you were in BC. Like Liam, some of your CDs and DVDs have found a new home. Unlike the majority of Liam's DVDs I actually quite like yours so will be more than happy to keep them should you decide not to bother looking for all the cases.
A few questions for both of you...is it really so difficult to put away your laundry? Take a hanger off the rack put the shirt on it. Put underwear and socks in their respective drawers. Place your already folded jeans in the hangythingermajinger. And how about when you undress? Is it so hard to place the clothes in the provided basket? I am always shocked when I go into your bathroom to discover a floor full of dirty clothes and an empty laundry basket. Not to mention all the places I find dirty clothes in your rooms. Laundry baskets, kids, they are one of man's greatest inventions. Please use them. While we were are discussing laundry I will say this...thus far you have been lucky enough that I go into your rooms, gather the clothes, take the baskets down two flights of stairs, wash your clothes, fold your clothes, take your clothes back upstairs to your room and sort them into easy to put away piles on your bed. I do NOT appreciate going into your rooms the next day and finding all my hard work lying on the floor. This quite annoys me. It makes me take God's name in vain. I do not like to break the ten commandments. One day I fear that I may break the big one, becuase frankly, everytime I look at your rooms murder crosses my minds. I digress. Back to the laundry. If you can not learn to put away your laundry I am going to stop washing your clothes. I know it would take a few weeks before you ran out of stuff, but after that you can go to school naked for all I care. Just letting you know that your mother is about to go on strike.
Oh and your rooms (and the basement too, Liam)? If they are not perfectly clean by the assigned dates everything is going. And I do mean EVERYTHING. You will be left with only a bed and a dresser. There will be no books or stuffed animals, Taylor, no lego or toy cars, Liam. Your mother? She is at the end of her rope.
But I still love you.
Love,
Mummy.
02 October, 2007
An open letter to my children
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25 comments:
I know it's serious, but even in your laying down the law mode, you seem formal. Cause you spell in British. Mummy and centre. I can't get over how proper your authority sounds just through mere spelling. Way to take back your house Emma. I'm impressed. Think can do something similar with Puppy? Cause the media room? It's truly frightening.
Emma, I so need to borrow this letter for my children. I have just roared at Mollie to get back upstairs and finish her room. Don't even get me started on laundry...how come Dillon can put dirty socks back into his drawers and cleans clothes in the laundry but not put dirty stuff in the laundry and clean stuff away. It drives me mad!
Weyhey!!! Nice one. Yes we are a bit like that too. Not so much their rooms but the playroom. My daughter's household chore is to get everyones' dirty laundry every night and sort out the colours etc. Eldest son's job is to keep the family room tidy. I am maybe wimping out as I put their clean laundry away - primarily as it only takes me a few minutes and I don't want to see it all just lying around. Good for you on the deadlines. Leave them some bin bags near their doors - tell them either way those bags will get filled! I am now going to go and make a 'no longer fits' basket for my daughters closet.
I am so forwarding this to my mom...I wanna kill my little brothers for the messes they leave her with!
I am in LOVE with this letter. Sadly though I think my husband would like to give it to me (mainly about laundry though - I never lose DVD cases and never leave food wrappers around). Good luck with the rooms!
beccy is talking about Dillon I can still remember what her (and sam's) rooms used to look like!
emma I wish I'd had that letter back then. I did use to keep things I found and then ask them BTW where is your so and so to try and shame them into being more tidy and careful~it didn't work.
I lo9ve this! Can I just copy it and change the names so that I can insert those most appropriate in my home? Thanks in advance. Oh, and good luck. Please let us know if it works.
Great letter Emma, you are doing their future spouses a favour, wish my husband's mother had sent this to him, especially re the dvd cases. But then he would probably say I should have got one about the make up all over our dresser - opps!
Oh mercy. I hope they get it together.
Way to lay the smack down! Stick to your guns, Emma.
Yikes! Do let us know if this works....
Mummy means business.
That is an awesome letter. Way to give them the proverbial kick in the behind. I must say, that the bedrooms in this house need some work. The youngest two are pretty bad, but getting better. I have left them to their own devices because I haven't had time or energy to deal with it. Humiliation and a 10 year old friend helping clean and organize their room gave them a bit of a kick. I think in a couple of years they will be caught up with the others.
I think you will be very successful in your endeavours especially if they don't find the cases to the games, CDs and DVDs. Way to go.
And you are funny.
Hugs to you today!
LOL. That is too funny. My mom went on strike when I was about 13 and I had to start doing my own laundry. I think I will do the same thing when Tabby gets older. ;)
Dear Taylor and Liam,
Your mom isn't f-ing around. Clean your damn rooms.
Love,
random mommy
When you get through laying down the law at your house, please come do it at mine.
I am so tired of being the bad guy around here. If someone else could take a turn, please....
boy, I'm exhausted just reading this.... I hope they'll clean up soon.
You have me quivering in my boots!
Although, my house is clean right now, since I had a party here on Sunday. And I just finished all the laundry last night, but there's a basket of it sitting on the couch waiting to be folded. I promise to do it promptly, please don't take my TV privileges away!
power to you!
I am sure I will need this letter at some point in my life...
Stick to your guns, Emma. Boundaries are so important;) and will serve your children well for life!
Both my children put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket now, without my asking. It took a while to nail that one down, but I don't have to ask them anymore.
I check their rooms everyday (when they're home) -- just a quick look. When they see me checking - they start scanning their respective rooms and tidy up. They KNOW what will happen (cds, books, games and anything precious - straight in the bin). This took a while to get the message across. And it killed me to throw valuable things away, but I figured the lesson was more valuable than possessions.
I realised at some point they wouldn't have respect for our home unless I rounded them up regularly and repeated the same things ad nauseum until-they-got-IT-already. A sucky part of parenting, but it has to be done.
Start with Saoirse and Sophie now -- get them to help Mummy put clean laundry away, load the dishwasher, sweep floors, etc. When they're getting ready for a bath - have them put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket, hang their own towels up on the rail, rinse the tub, etc. Then give them lots of praise for being such good helpers.
I made the mistake with my first child (read: daughter - the sloppy one) of just doing everything because it was easier and faster. With my son --- I knew I had to teach him from a very early age to put things away or go nuts drowning in their clutter.
Hang in there!!!! It's so worth the effort in the end.
Whats really sad is I'm already ready to do this around our house. Why is it sad? Because we don't have very much here yet and their rooms are already trashed! How is that? It's like they produce trash and messes even when their isn't much around to do it with.
Trust me Emma I feel your messy pain.....
Ah yes. That's all I have to say on that LOL I am SO glad I am older and my kids are older. Because now I just get to sit back and laugh at all you young parents. I mean. Not laugh. Well ok laugh.
I heart you Emma!!! Seriously! This letter is perfect. Not mean or scary, just to the point telling them what you expect, when you expect it and what will happen if they do not do what you have asked.
I will have to keep this in mind when Kaylie gets a little older.
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