I am so ready for the tree to come down

I'm feeling a little grinchy. I said to William on Boxing Day that I was going to take the tree down the next day as it is so big and so in my way that it is driving me crazy. It's almost Friday and the tree is not down, due to the bad mood of one wee Sophie. Seriously, the child does nothing but cry. The only person she is loving these days is me and it has taken a serious toll on my boobs. We figure she fed about 20 times today, from the time she woke up at 7 until she finally fell asleep (sucking of course) at 10.30. I don't know what's up with her. Anyway, due to her very neediness I have not been able to do anything, never mind take down the tree. I am glad William has been home this week, now he knows what she is like and why so little sometimes gets done. Mind, she isn't usually this bad.

So it was a lovely Christmas. I personally received everything on my Christmas list on the sidebar except for the third season of Facts of Life (God! How I loved watching the first two years. Memories!) I didn't get all of the stuff from IKEA either, the coffee table and bookcase were out of stock when I was there early in December but I did get the two side tables, as well as a corner TV bench. Christmas gifts to me from me. I also received the DVD of the complete series of
Freaks and Geeks, quite possibly the best TV show to get cancelled after less than a year, two Christmas episodes of Little House on the Prairie and It's a Wonderful Life, both of which had previously only been owned on video. Needless to say I have lots of stuff to watch, which is great considering the shite that is this year's lineup. My dad made me a beautiful celtic cross, I'm not sure where I should put it though. It currently sits on top of my scrapbooking organizer.

All four kids did very well, even Sophie loved tearing the paper. She is finally enjoying toys so had a great time with everything she received. The highlight was at my mum's where Taylor received a cell phone. My mum had gotten her a messenger bag and I said "Look inside to see if Nanny gave you a loonie" and there was the cell phone, all charged up, with a happy bunny charm, and ready for Taylor to pick out her number. She was so excited she couldn't even speak, and Taylor silent is a rare moment indeed.

So now I need to get my house into order, which is why I want the tree down. It sits right where I want Saoirse's train table to go. William built it on Boxing Day, he offered on Christmas Eve, but I figured it would take to long so said to leave it. 15 minutes was all it took. Who knew? Things are going well on the William front, he has been very mellow the last 2 weeks, but I am not sure how long that will last after his gift from my brother runs out.

That's about it. Baby awake again. I may have a nervous breakdown yet.

December 24th

It's twenty after four on Christmas Eve morning. I have just finished wrapping the last of the presents. My livingroom is overran by gifts, the Santa presents are in the garage and the basement. I still have a lot to do, including two major things I should have done last night- steamcleaning and washing the sofa cushions. I wonder if I can kick the family out of the house for a few hours tomorrow. You know, in the end it always comes together...the house will be clean, the children will be bathed, the gifts will all make it under the tree...but you stress yourself trying to get there. At least, I do. Off to see if I can get an hour or two of sleep before the baby wakes.

Have a great Christmas.

A Christmas Story

The Christmas I was 6 (1979...yikes!) I received a dollhouse. I was very excited about this dollhouse, it was number one on my Christmas wish list. It was a house that required a parent and child build it. Easy peasy for my dad, seeing as how he was a tiler and had general knowledge of all things construction.

"We'll put it together tomorrow, Emma." says my dad. And so the box remained propped up against the wall behind the Christmas tree.

Tomorrow came but the house was not built. I'm not sure exactly why, but I can assume my dad was nursing one hell of a hangover and/or was drunk. Well, I shouldn't say 'assume'. I knew.

A few days later the box made it's way up to my room, not to be built, but to find a new home under my bed. And there it remained, seen only when I was looking for something or having my furniture moved around. When I was about 10 my mother decided that it should be thrown out and said something to the effect of "I don't know why we got you this, your dad never follows through on anything."

I tell you this story because for Christmas Saoirse is to receive a train table, which requires building. It was to be built tonight so that we could make sure there were no missing pieces. Needless to say it is still up against the wall in my bedroom closet. This is because William, who stopped in at the neighbours' at 6pm to drop off their son did not come back in until gone 10, and came home slightly worse for the wear.

I am none to pleased, as I had a thousand and one things to do tonight, none of which actually got done. And yes, I should be doing them instead of bitching about the fact that nothing is done.

And no, I could not build the train table myself because 1) I couldn't carry it down the stairs on my own, 2) I am NOT a feminist and totally believe that a man should do that sort of thing. Mind, I also believe a man should clean the house so I would not like to be considered anti-feminist and 3) while I could probably build the table myself (with a lot of swearing) I choose not to because I would then be expected to do all that sort of thing on my own such as put up shelves and whatnot. No, a man has to be good for something. Why else would I put up with one?

4 months and 12 days

Sophie is sitting. She keeps her hand on the floor but can stay up for ages. She did it for the first time just over a month ago but can now do it with confidence. She also pulls herself into a standing position if she's holding your hand. There's pictures of course but I still can't upload. Urgh. Bloody falling apart computer.

I can almost strike that off my list.

Today I almost finished my Christmas shopping. I say almost because I forgot to buy a gift for my friend Janine and her new husband. I am just going to get them the holiday pack from the movie theatre so if William takes the kids to the movies this weekend I will get him to grab it. That way I may not have to go near the mall again until Boxing Day. Oh, and I have to get an Archie comic for Taylor's stocking, but I can just grab that at the Mac's up the road. It's tradition, she tells me, but I think I've only put one in her stocking once, maybe twice. But who am I to ruin her idea of a tradition?

They say the average Canadian will spend $938 on Christmas gifts this year. It's about $30 higher for Albertans though apparently. I should have read the article a bit more thoroughly as now I'm wondering is that meant to be per family or each and every Canadian? Or is it just adults? I should gather all my receipts and figure out just how much I've spent, because in the last week alone I'm pretty sure I spent $1500. And I started in July.

Anyway, I found an Oilers jersey for Taylor. She really wanted Ry@n Smy.th's name on the back, but it's an extra $100 and I'm a bit on the cheap side. He'd probably get traded in January if I bought her one knowing my luck. Of course, I have my Buchberger one for years before he got traded. I also bought her a few books, one that I have to return because my mum got it for her when she was in England. It's a Jacqueline Wilson novel, and I have never seen her here before. I also got an omnibus by another English author, whos name escapes me at the moment. I think she'll enjoy it though.

I finished off William and got my mum the Sarah McLachlan Christmas CD she wanted, picked up a shirt for my dad, Starbucks cards for Liam's teacher assistants, one for the T.A. in Taylor's class and one for her music teacher, who Taylor just loves. She was my fifth grade teacher many moons ago, which is sort of odd. I got her teacher an HMV gift card. And that's me done. Yea!

Now I just have to do everything else on that bloody list.

The Birthday Gifts

Since I've become a mother my birthday has not been a very big deal. It is in the midst of a time when I am Christmas focused, and I prefer to see money go towards gifts for the kids. That doesn't mean my birthday is forgotten; usually I will get a CD or a DVD or some books. And a jumper from my mother of course.

This year, though, I got some fanatstic gifts. My brother gave me a $200 gift card for Eve.lyn Ch@rles. What to do with it? I might get a $100 haircut (very unusual for me, I am a $35 girl) and a facial. I would love a pedicure but the thought of someone touching my feet totally ucks me out. My brother wanted me to get a full body massage to which I said HA!! Seriously, does he let think I am going to let some guy, or worse, some skinny minnie, get anywhere my nude body? No, I don't need people having that image in their head. There's enough who already know.

From William and the kids, I received something I thought I might get for Christmas...a portable photo printer. It is the best thing ever! It prints great pictures in colour, black and white, sepia and antique. You can add borders, clip art and greetings. I can edit my pictures on it. I absolutely love it. Now when I go to a crop night or my scrapbooking weekend in April all I need to do is decide on a page and then print off the two or three pictures I want. Usually, I spend so much time agonizing over the huge unsorted pile of photos that I get nothing at all done.

I also got a $50 gift certificate to a clothing store from my mum, along with the annual jumper ( a lovely black one, takes 5 pounds off) and $3.03 from Liam. For 33 you know.

Things I need to do before Sunday (aka Christmas Eve, which is only FIVE days away!)

1. Clean my entire house from top to bottom. Well, top and middle. William did the basement the other weekend.
2. Put away all accumulated laundry. I am great at doing the laundry, folding the laundry and leaving it in baskets. I think there are about 3 in the girls room. And not just 3 little laundry baskets. 2 big rubbermaind containers and one laundry basket.
3. Sort all the clothes that no longer fit the four children and move out of upstairs hallway where they have been residing since September.
4. Finish wrapping presents. Impossible to do today, Liam is home sick. Was up until 3.30 last night, the two wee girls' Santa presents are done.
5. Build Saoirse's train table, the only gift to be left unwrapped.
6. Steamclean livingroom carpet. Why is it that the week before Christmas my kids decide to spill cups of tea and glasses of coke? Not to mention Sophie's two explosive poops. I can't wait until the laminate is installed.
7. Wash sofa cushions. Coke has also made it on to them. I wasn't to worried because my new leather sofa was supposed to arrive last Tuesday and then I was told it would arrive the 22nd. Cutting it close, but at least it would be here for Christmas. Yeah. No. It'll be here in January. Never order a sofa from the Brick.
8. Finish Christmas shopping. I thought I was done. I was wrong. Liam has way more stuff than Taylor. Will purchase an Oilers jersey for Taylor to make up for my neglect. And books. Can not believe the girl does not have a single book bought for her. Still need to get for William, my mum, my dad and my cousin. Oh, and 5 of 6 teachers.
9. Make Christmas cards for said teachers.
10. Scrap a 2007 calendar for my mum. Will not be able to finish until Christmas Eve as the December picture will be the 4 kids in front of the tree in their Christmas Eve pjs.
11. Assemble, wrap and distribute presents made by kids at Christmas party for their parents.

Things to do when you are sick, part 2

By Saoirse, holding steady at age 2.

14. Stay in your pajamas all day. Why not? You aren't going anywhere.
15. Refuse to nap.
16. Have a brief rest on your mummy's shoulder.
17. Decide to take one piece pajamas off. If they have a button at the top, and you are only two and can't undo button, just unzip and leave on as though you are wearing a cape with feet.
18. Decide to sit on sofa.
19. Surprise your mummy by falling asleep within seconds.
20. Sleep for almost 2 hours.
21. Cry when your daddy tries to wake you up.
22. Wake up. Be grumpy. You're sick so no one minds. Not that you should care if they do.
23. Refuse to sit in your seat at the table. Sit on daddy's lap throughout meal.
24. Eat only the grated cheese.
25. Sit with your daddy and watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
26. Tell your older brother to "GO AWAY!!" when he is sitting next to your daddy.
27. Tell your little sister to "GO AWAY!!" when your daddy holds her.
28. Remind your brother that it is "MY DADDY." Tell him repeatedly so he doesn't forget.
29. Cry and push brother towards basement door.
30. Announce with glee that you too are going downstairs.
31. Mood swings are perfectly acceptable when sick.
32. Go to bed with daddy.
33. Come downstairs with daddy.
34. Drink some more chocolate milk.
35. Ask for chocolate.
36. Go to bed with daddy.

Things to do when you are sick

By Saoirse, age 2.

1. Cry for Daddy when you get up in the morning.
2. Watch Curious George twice.
3. Watch Clifford and Dragonland.
4. Play so much that you don't notice when your mummy changes the channel and puts on the View instead.
5. Help Mummy wrap Christmas presents.
6. Put the Christmas presents under the tree for your mummy, which gets you out of the way for 15 seconds.
7. Refuse to eat.
8. Drink chocolate milk all day long.
9. Lie on the floor and stare at all the green stuff that you can pick out of your nose.
10. Ignore your mummy when she tells you toget a tissue.
11. Put green stuff in your mouth.
12. Laugh when your mummy says "No, no! Don't put that in your mouth!!!"
13. Laugh even harder when mummy says "EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!"

Don't believe a word of this, it's total crap.

What Your Bathroom Habits Say About You

You are a giving soul. Way too giving in fact. You often get stuck doing the dirty work that no one else will do. You spend a lot on clothes, and you tend to be a very dresser. However, it's hard for you to throw away trendy clothes when they go out of style. You are a little shy and easily embarrassed. You often wonder if you are normal. In relationships, you tend to be very romantic and demanding. You'll treat your partner like gold, but you expect a lot in return.

What Do Your Bathroom Habits Say About You?

The shy and easily embarassed? So true. I don't question my normalcy though. Well, not most days. I do get stuck doing the dirty work quite often. I think that's because I said if I went into a messy bathroom at a party I would clean it. However, that's only because I wouldn't want to leave the bathroom, have someone enter immediately behind me and think that I left that mess. But really it depends on the mess...is it vomit? Believe me, I'd be out of there before I threw up myself. Pee on the seat? I'll clean that up. God knows I have to at my own house. Damn peoples I live with.

I am not a "very dresser" whatever that may be. My kids may be, their mother is not. I don't spend a lot of money on clothes. I love sales. I live for a good sale. Boxing Day is only 9 days away folks. Let's see what I can find this year.

I am not a romantic and I am far from demanding. If I were skinny I would be the lazy man's perfect girlfriend. As long as the fella doesn't mind doing the cooking, cause I hate it.

A shameless plug, part 2

It's my birthday. I am oooolllllllld.

My brother arrived in town yesterday morning, is making me a birthday lunch today and then departing to Calgary either later tonight or early Sunday morning. He is off to England for a month.

Other than my family, will anyone remember my birthday? My friend Bev did but I don't expect anyone else will. If no one does, you will be regaled with the story of my 8th birthday, the saddest birthday ever.

Sad moment of Emma's 33rd (see old!) birthday #1: It is currently 12.30am. My phone just rang, something it does not usually do at this time of the day, unless William is in Australia. I see it's my dad calling with my first birthday greeting of the day. Um no. He is calling to see if my brother is still here. So much for being a daddy's girl. It does you no good 30 years later.

Anyway, happy birthday to me!

And if you care, you can see what shameless plug number one is here.

When 11 year olds go mad

There are days when I feel like the 'terrible twos' will never end. The problem is it's not my 2 year old going through them, it's my almost 12 year old. We have been going through this terrible phase of temper tantrums and crying over nothing and everything for, oh, about 10 1/2 years. When will it end?

It's not every day, I'd say that for the last year or so it has been on average once or twice a week. Maybe 3 times. Which is a great improvement over the 6-7 times per week it was before that.

Today's fit was over a voice recognition program we have on our computer. My grandad bought it for Liam last year, it was installed but Liam never has done the inital set up. The fact that he has to read some 50 sentences has him put off. Taylor asked if she could set herself up on it. I said no, it is meant for Liam, he needs to do it.

Well, you'd think I had just told her that I was buying Liam a brand new computer that she was never allowed to use. "Why does Liam get everything and I get nothing!" This from the girl who has so much stuff in her room, I can hardly move in it. I said that the program is meant for Liam so he can use the computer without having to type. Let's face it, it's hard to type something when you can hardly read a word. "It's not my fault I can read!" she says "I hate typing!" Surely, I say, she wouldn't prefer to have dyslexia just so she can get away without typing. Oh, she would. This pissed me off immensely. I freaked. I called her selfish and said I couldn't believe such comments came out of her mouth. She was screaming and crying about how unfair it is that she can read and has to type. And how Liam is treated as though he is special so he gets EVERYTHING and she gets NOTHING.

I ended up saying that if she thinks she really gets nothing then that's how it will be- she can forget about going skiing with her class, about all field trips, birthday parties and Girl Guides. She can do nothing and get nothing as far as I am concerned.

I really don't know what to do about her. For awhile when she was 4 I kept a journal about her tantrums and why she had them as she was supposed to be assessed. I may have to start this again, and it'll be into the blog it goes, since I am not a very good journal keeper. Here's a smaple tantrum from the age of 4 years, 11 months: for playschool, each child is required to bring some sort of fruit for a friendship fruit salad. I have cantaloupe in the fridge so I say she can use that. She freaks out, she wants oranges. She screams and cries and I literally dragged her to school, where she proceeds to be very pleasant but refuses to touch the cantaloupe so the parent helper gives her oranges to peel. And in those days, they were everyday. When she was very little, from 14 months or so, when she had a tantrum she would just fall asleep where she lying screaming. Yesterday Saoirse was going through an album and the first 5 pages contained 6 pictures of Taylor just lying on the floor sleeping with a tear stained face.

Saoirse, thank God, is actually pretty good, just the odd cry when she doesn't get her own way but it ends quickly and then she is fine. Hopefully Sophie will be the same way, I seriously could not handle another Taylor.

Holy crap, it's the middle of December!!!

Are you aware that it is only an hour away from the 14th of December? And that I am totally not ready for Christmas? Do you know how many presents are wrapped and under my tree? Let me enlighten you. One. That's right, ONE. It is the only wrapped present in the entire house. Do you know when I can wrap presents in a child free enviornment? From approximately midnight until 6am. This is generally when I enjoy a little known thing called sleep. At least I try to enjoy it. When a 2 year old kicks you in the back all night and you can't find your ear plugs to drown out the sound of people breathing it is hard to sleep. Yes, I sleep with ear plugs. Because people make noise when they breathe and I like silence. Yet, I can fall asleep with the TV on. Go figure.

Anyway, I am getting a start. Tonight I sorted out the clothes that everyone is getting and I discovered that Sophie only has 3 pairs of pants. So it will be back to Old Navy for me. Liam also needs socks, as does Taylor. I bought two pairs of jeans for him today, they were on sale for $15 each. Taylor is all done as far as clothes go, though I do need to buy her a black skirt for her Christmas concert. They both still need their "big" present, a TV for her and and a TV and DVD player for him. I'm not ripping her off, I already have her DVD player. Just a few movies after that and I am done. I think Taylor may be slightly disappointed, she asked for a snowboard but I didn't really think she was serious and she just mentioned the other day that she didn't want to send in her skiing forms for school until after Christmas because if she gets a snowboard she'd rather do that. Oops. I said "Well, I can tell you you aren't getting a snowboard." Nor is she getting the Oilers jersey she only mentioned this past Saturday. Her birthday is in March so it shouldn't kill her to wait.

I think I'm done until I remember everyone who is not my child. My mum (partially), my aunt and cousin coming from Vancouver, my friends' kids, William. What to get William? He's not a Christmas sort of person. When you ask he says "nothing." Clothes, I've got. I just don't know what else to get him.

Must go to bed, I took an hour and wrapped presents, there are now 10 under the tree. But not a single one for Liam, who I can guarantee will be the one who goes looking to see who has what under there.

Oh, and 2 days till the birthday. I mentioned it briefly today because my brother was supposed to be making a lovely meal for me but instead he is leaving for Calgary that day. Not that he's even in Edmonton yet. Should be here tomorrow, so much for spending my birthday with me!! William hasn't mentioned it, so I'll see what happens on the day. Things better on that front than in the last few days, by the way.

Sometimes I should just shut up

You know, I almost liked things the way they were. Not knowing was better than knowing, I think.

I had a really long post written and I just eeased it. I am not sure how much of my life I can put out there. Details hurt, I realized as I wrote what happened last night. Remembering the exact words in a conversation is horribly painful.

To be quick...after a bit of a fight over Saoirse burning her hand (my fault) and Himself's dinner not being warm (also my fault apparently) I asked what his plans are for when he gets his permanent residency. "What do you mean?" he says. I say does he plan on moving out or what? He wants to stay near Saoirse and Sophie (note to self- does not mention Taylor and Liam), things are not working out between the two of us.

So I guess that's it. I'd still say we need to talk, even if it's just to make arrangements as to how we live together in some semblance of peace over the next 6 or so months. Number one: I do NOT make dinner for my roommates.

The cheesy love songs playlist (aka the longest post I have ever written)

Some of you may have noticed there's been a picture of Lionel Ritchie on my blog for the last few weeks. This is not because I am a fan of Lionel, oh no, not at all, I have been quite frightened of him since the days when the only videos I saw were Friday afternoons when Video Hits was on CBC. My parents, you see, were to cheap to go past channel 13, so there was no Much Music in our house. Even today, my mother only has up to channel 31.

But I digress. The reason I have had Mr. Ritchie's picture gracing (cursing?) my blog is because I, perhaps rather foolishly, joined a cheesy love song CD exchange hosted by Frema. I say foolishly because I am a natural fuck up. The CDs were due to be mailed out to my group last Friday. I have the tendancy to leave everything to the very last minute and this was no different. Thursday night finds me downloading songs. And it's all going very well, until my computer shuts off. And shuts off again and again. I don't know what the hell I did but I can tell you I was extremely happy to see the return of my email today. Anyways, there was no chance of me making the CDs so I called my ex. He was willing to make them for me, so when my kids saw him on Saturday I sent along my playlist, along with a selection of other songs if he couldn't get all the ones I had on CD.

And, blah, he could not. Missing is my all time favourite loved-them-as-a-teenager band, The Jesus and Mary Chain. I was going to use "Sometimes Always", a ballad with Hope Sandoval who was with Mazzy Star at the time. It's not a cheesy song, but it is a love song and JAMC wasn't really known for them. Though Almost Gold was one of my wedding songs. (Along with Afghan Whigs 'True Love Travels on a Gravel Road' and Van Morrison's Moondance, for those who care about that sort of stuff.)

I tried to put in alot of Canadian content. Missing from the final playlist are Michael Buble's Home, Rocket Girl by Doc Walker, Thank You by McMaster and James and Freak Luck by Bob Kemmis "Freak Luck put a car in the way/ I wasn't looking for love but our eyes met/ As I bounced off your Chevrolet."

I ended up with a CD that has 8 Canadian songs out of a total of 18. I don't think most of the songs are cheesy, but cheese is up to each individual I suppose. Most of the songs certainly have a few cheesy lyrics. Almost all of them have some meaning to me and when I hear them I automatically think of a year or a particular person. So here is my list. Canadian artists are starred as such **.

1) Toad the Wet Sprocket- I Will Not Take These Things for Granted. No particular reason, just find it a bit on the sappy side and somewhat depressing.

2) **Jann Arden/ Sarah McLachlan- I Would Die For You. "I've never kissed a sweeter mouth/ I've never been swept away/ It's what dreams are made up of/ Don't you know I could not survive/ Without you in my life/ I would die for you." This is not a cheesy song, but any song that says one couldn't survive without a man/woman in their life deserves a mention. However, if you relate the lyrics to a child it is totally fitting. I would die for my kids and that is it.

3) **Sky- Love Song. One hit wonders. Probably only in Canada at that. And I don't think it was this song, I think it was Some Kinda Wonderful.

4) Modern English- I Melt With You. Entered the realm of cheesiness when used for a hamburger commercial. Was it Burger King? I think it was.

5) **City and Colour. Comin' Home. The first time I heard this song, I cried. It wasn't that long ago and it was these lyrics: "I never thought you could leave me, I figured I was the one." Foolish it is, to figure you are someone's the one. Anyway, I love this guy's voice and this CD is on my Christmas wish list.

6) Cutting Crew- (I Just) Died In Your Arms Tonight. This song totally makes me think of junior high. My friend Sandra was dating this guy Dave and this was their song. Why do I remebmer such things? I have no idea. Probably because I had no one to have a song with in junior high. That had to wait until high school.

7) **The Rankin Family- Fare Thee Well Love. It just is. And just so you know, Jimmy Rankin would totally go on my top 10 celebrities to sleep with.

8) Teenage Fanclub- Guiding Star. I don't think this one is cheesy, in fact, it's Taylor's song. The first verse is written in her baby book. "When everything you own is lost/ And every friendship has its cost/ Your rolling stone has gathered moss/ And all your clouds cover the sun/ And all your karma has undone/ Remember you're my number one/ hey, you're my guiding star/ I do know who you are/ You're my guiding star." For all the problems Taylor and I have, I hope she always knows that she can come to me. When I used to sing her this song as I baby, I used to picture her at around the age she is now. I hope she is a happier teenager than I was, but I doubt it.

9)**Corey Hart. I Am By Your Side. When I was 10 I fell madly in love with Corey Hart. He was my first crush and I wore out the cassette of First Offense. It's a classic album, in my opinion but then I sort of have odd tastes. Jenny Fey, Sunglasses at Night, It Ain't Enough...holy crap, why did I not use It Ain't Enough?? Or Everything in my Heart? I will tell you why. Because I Am By Your Side was on Much More Retro as i was choosing the songs and it is possibly the cheesiest Corey Hart video ever (with the exception of Boy in the Box, void because it is not a love song.) "Boy! Don't you walk away from me! Boy! " and then he drives off on his motorcycle. Cheesy videos at the best. I am sure it must have made Much Music's Fromage list for 1987. Or was it '86? The years blur.

10)**Glass Tiger- Someday. I was rather fond of Glass Tiger back in the day. Again, dates are fuzzy. Somewhere between 85- 87. My brother owned this album and I used to steal it off of him. Bryan Adams did backing vocals on one of the songs. Either this one or I Will Be There. Alan Frew, who was the lead singer, is now on CMT with some American Idol like show. He also did a play in Toronto that my friend's son was in and when she went she told him that I was a big fan (slight exaggeration) and he signed a CD for me. I have yet to listen to it because when you open it there is a picture of him in his bare feet and bare feet totally freak me out. So I have to shut it quickly, no time to take out the CD. I was a little suprised to discover he was a Rangers fan, I suppose I always assume everyone from Glasgow is Celtic fan. only because everyone that I know from Glasgow is actually a Celtic fan. It says it right on the side of the cover RANGERSELFISHANDCHIPSCOTLAND.

11)Spandu Ballet- True.
The German Bastard put this on a mixed tape he made me when we first started dating. It warrants inclusion based solely on that fact alone.

12) **Blue Rodeo- Try. I love this song, it was my first introduction to Blue Rodeo, a band I still love today and have seen live numerous times. Not a cheesy song, but certainly looks at when you look at the linked lyrics.

13) Billy Vera- At This Moment. This is the first -and last- slow song William and I ever danced to.

14) Daniel Bedingfield- If You're Not the One. The lyrics are definitely cheesy, but I do like this song.

15)The Lightning Seeds- Pure. I absolutely love this song and this is one of a very few albums wherre I actually like every single song.

16) Richard Marx- Right Here Waiting. Summer 1989. Everytime I hear this song it brings back memories of that summer. It was "our" song, the German bastard and I. I don't know why, since we were never oceans apart, but I assume it was the song for many couples back then. Looking at the lyrics it suits the first few years of my relationship with William much better, since we really were oceans apart. But it's not our song and neither is At This Moment (the only one we ever danced to if you recall), it is You're the One by Maire Brennan and Shane McGowan from the Circle fo Friends soundtrack.

17) Rick Astley- Together Forever. Another one from the late 80s. I am totally a child of the 80s and when I was in Grade 8 Rick Astley was hugely popular. I never owned a Rick Astley album though. My mother had some sense and never bought one for me.

18) Gordon Lightfoot- If You Could Read My Mind. A Canadian icon. Not really cheesy but included because of the lines "If I could read your mind love/ What a tale your thoughts could tell/ Just like a paperback novel/ The kind the drugstore sells." I was never a fan of him and it was actually a friend from Ireland that sent me a CD with some songs on it. He was a huge fan, he used to fly to Canada to see him. That's dedication. Oh, and wealth. Of which I have neither.

So that's my CD. It is missing a lot of songs that I would have liked to see on it, including these gems: Missing an Angel -Johnny Reid
You'll Never Walk Alone- Gerry and the Pacemakers (opposed for inclusion on my list by William because it is a love song to a daughter, not a love song as per se. Still, if Liverpool can use it as their song, surely I could include it on my CD.)
I Was made For Loving You- KILT
These Things I Believe- Sons of Maxwell
and the cheesiest of all cheesiest songs- Patrick Sawyze's 'She's Like the Wind.' Yes, I own the Dirty Dancing Soundtrack. Not only that one, but the More Dirty Dancing one as well. Taste? Not much.

Calgon, take me away...

Warning! This post contains some bitching!

It's been a bit. I am having massive computer problems, as in the computer is about to go out the window. I was supposed to send off a few CDs last week as I am doing a CD exchange but I could not download a thing. So needless to say, my CDs are late. I still can't upload pictures, and the computer no longer just freezes, it shuts itself off. I have been affected by a massive virus. Hopefully we can swing a new one after Christmas.

Anyway, there have been some shitey days around here. Sophie has been absolutely miserable, even for me. My dad spent two days with us and it seemed as though she did nothing but cry. I am babysitting my friend's 3 year old son all week, which is actually very good because he and Saoirse play so well together. But still, having that extra child throws off the routine.

What else? I am planning a Christmas party for 25 kids between the ages of 2 and 12. With the age difference it's been a bit hard. What games can you play and crafts can you make that will satisfy everyone? None, methinks. And of course, as with every other thing around here, people promise to help you out and do they?? Of course not. My friend was supposed to come over last Saturday and again today and she never bothered to show up. I have gift bags to make up for Santa to hand out, crafts to get ready and games to prepare. I'll be doing it after Sophie goes to bed for the next few nights I guess. But not tonight...totally not in the mood. Tomorrow afternoon, I'll be sending Taylor and her friends over to decorate the office for the party. Oh, crap. That just reminded me that I'll have not only the 3 year old tomorrow afternoon but his 2 sisters. The older one will go with Taylor probably. Actually, the three of them are really good, much better than their cousins who are living hell to babysit.

I woke up feeling so blah today and couldn't figure out why. it wasn't until I realized the date that I got it. Today is the first anniversary of my nan's death, which I wrote about here. I talked to my mum, who was okay with it, feels her mum is happier now as she didn't like being sick, but my aunt in Vancouver (previously the aunt in London if you read that post) had a really bad day. As for me, I have found myself crying over my nan a lot in the last year. I wish I had spent more time with her, and shown more appreciation for the time I did get to spend with her. Except for the 2 weeks in Tenerife when I saw way more of her 68 year old boobs than an 18 year old needs to.

Things still the same with Himself. I must say something soon. I dread when he goes to bed because he just goes on up and hardly even says goodnight. I think that's the time when I'm the saddest. I put off going to bed myself because I hate sleeping next to him knowing that if I even accidentally touch him he will move away. Ach, I'm being pathetic. The whole thing is really. I keep saying that but I do nothing about it. It must be 6 weeks now.

This post is all over the place. I should start again tomorrow when I am in a better frame of mind. Then again, I might not be in a better frame of mind until after this party on Sunday. Of course, by then it'll be only 2 weeks to Christmas and knowing me I will not have sent off my international Christmas cards. I was supposed to make all my own this year but didn't even get around to it, though I did manage to make some beautiful ones for my friend. Plus I haven't wrapped a single gift, have yet to finish shopping for William, along with everyone else who did not spend nine months hanging out in my uterus. Oh and what else? I have spent wayyyyy to much money on Saoirse. Even though I've technically been done her for ages I keep buying more, the last being this last night. I have so much stuff for her that I am going to have to put away some for Easter. The problem is her age you see. At two, they love everything. And she loves her dolls so much, so she'll enjoy this one.

I've gone on again. You know, my posts are way better in my head. I should just think, not write. Course I would then go insane with all the crap running around in there.