Calgon, take me away...

Warning! This post contains some bitching!

It's been a bit. I am having massive computer problems, as in the computer is about to go out the window. I was supposed to send off a few CDs last week as I am doing a CD exchange but I could not download a thing. So needless to say, my CDs are late. I still can't upload pictures, and the computer no longer just freezes, it shuts itself off. I have been affected by a massive virus. Hopefully we can swing a new one after Christmas.

Anyway, there have been some shitey days around here. Sophie has been absolutely miserable, even for me. My dad spent two days with us and it seemed as though she did nothing but cry. I am babysitting my friend's 3 year old son all week, which is actually very good because he and Saoirse play so well together. But still, having that extra child throws off the routine.

What else? I am planning a Christmas party for 25 kids between the ages of 2 and 12. With the age difference it's been a bit hard. What games can you play and crafts can you make that will satisfy everyone? None, methinks. And of course, as with every other thing around here, people promise to help you out and do they?? Of course not. My friend was supposed to come over last Saturday and again today and she never bothered to show up. I have gift bags to make up for Santa to hand out, crafts to get ready and games to prepare. I'll be doing it after Sophie goes to bed for the next few nights I guess. But not tonight...totally not in the mood. Tomorrow afternoon, I'll be sending Taylor and her friends over to decorate the office for the party. Oh, crap. That just reminded me that I'll have not only the 3 year old tomorrow afternoon but his 2 sisters. The older one will go with Taylor probably. Actually, the three of them are really good, much better than their cousins who are living hell to babysit.

I woke up feeling so blah today and couldn't figure out why. it wasn't until I realized the date that I got it. Today is the first anniversary of my nan's death, which I wrote about here. I talked to my mum, who was okay with it, feels her mum is happier now as she didn't like being sick, but my aunt in Vancouver (previously the aunt in London if you read that post) had a really bad day. As for me, I have found myself crying over my nan a lot in the last year. I wish I had spent more time with her, and shown more appreciation for the time I did get to spend with her. Except for the 2 weeks in Tenerife when I saw way more of her 68 year old boobs than an 18 year old needs to.

Things still the same with Himself. I must say something soon. I dread when he goes to bed because he just goes on up and hardly even says goodnight. I think that's the time when I'm the saddest. I put off going to bed myself because I hate sleeping next to him knowing that if I even accidentally touch him he will move away. Ach, I'm being pathetic. The whole thing is really. I keep saying that but I do nothing about it. It must be 6 weeks now.

This post is all over the place. I should start again tomorrow when I am in a better frame of mind. Then again, I might not be in a better frame of mind until after this party on Sunday. Of course, by then it'll be only 2 weeks to Christmas and knowing me I will not have sent off my international Christmas cards. I was supposed to make all my own this year but didn't even get around to it, though I did manage to make some beautiful ones for my friend. Plus I haven't wrapped a single gift, have yet to finish shopping for William, along with everyone else who did not spend nine months hanging out in my uterus. Oh and what else? I have spent wayyyyy to much money on Saoirse. Even though I've technically been done her for ages I keep buying more, the last being this last night. I have so much stuff for her that I am going to have to put away some for Easter. The problem is her age you see. At two, they love everything. And she loves her dolls so much, so she'll enjoy this one.

I've gone on again. You know, my posts are way better in my head. I should just think, not write. Course I would then go insane with all the crap running around in there.