A letter to express my dismay

Dear Carolina Hurricanes players,

Well. Thanks an awful lot for winning game 7 last night. You have really put our household into one hell of a mess. Could you not have let the Buffalo Sabres keep that 2-1 lead?

There are four reasons for why you should have let Buffalo win:

1) I have had a wee crush on Mike Grier since his days as an Oiler and it would have been nice to see him for at least four more games.

2) The Sabres are a bit of a lesser team than yourselves, therefore increasing the Oilers chance of winning the cup.

3) There is just something wrong with a team from that far south winning the cup.

4) This is the most important one: our Liam is a huge 'Canes fan. You should be grateful that I have been unable to buy him one of your jerseys in this city, because if he was beaten up for his support of youse I would have to hold your organization entirely responsible. I am not sure that you should be willing to allow a 10 year old boy be ostracized for his support of the wrong team in this hockey mad city. Surely you have seen what a small group of eejits has done to Whyte Ave.
Not to mention what Liam's support of your team will do to our household. The poor boy will be banished to the basement to watch the game while we are watching in the livingroom. This is baecause I myself am not sure what I would do to him if he screams and hollers and dances around if you score on the Oilers. It was bad enough listening to him while you played Montreal, a team I supported only because they are Canadian.

So please do me a favour and lose this series in four. I would really appreciate it.

Sincerely,
Emma

P.S. Liam would love it if you could send him an autographed team picture. I'd say a jersey, but I do prefer him with his 2 hazel eyes. I don't think black would suit him.