Don't believe a word of this, it's total crap.

What Your Bathroom Habits Say About You

You are a giving soul. Way too giving in fact. You often get stuck doing the dirty work that no one else will do. You spend a lot on clothes, and you tend to be a very dresser. However, it's hard for you to throw away trendy clothes when they go out of style. You are a little shy and easily embarrassed. You often wonder if you are normal. In relationships, you tend to be very romantic and demanding. You'll treat your partner like gold, but you expect a lot in return.

What Do Your Bathroom Habits Say About You?

The shy and easily embarassed? So true. I don't question my normalcy though. Well, not most days. I do get stuck doing the dirty work quite often. I think that's because I said if I went into a messy bathroom at a party I would clean it. However, that's only because I wouldn't want to leave the bathroom, have someone enter immediately behind me and think that I left that mess. But really it depends on the mess...is it vomit? Believe me, I'd be out of there before I threw up myself. Pee on the seat? I'll clean that up. God knows I have to at my own house. Damn peoples I live with.

I am not a "very dresser" whatever that may be. My kids may be, their mother is not. I don't spend a lot of money on clothes. I love sales. I live for a good sale. Boxing Day is only 9 days away folks. Let's see what I can find this year.

I am not a romantic and I am far from demanding. If I were skinny I would be the lazy man's perfect girlfriend. As long as the fella doesn't mind doing the cooking, cause I hate it.

A shameless plug, part 2

It's my birthday. I am oooolllllllld.

My brother arrived in town yesterday morning, is making me a birthday lunch today and then departing to Calgary either later tonight or early Sunday morning. He is off to England for a month.

Other than my family, will anyone remember my birthday? My friend Bev did but I don't expect anyone else will. If no one does, you will be regaled with the story of my 8th birthday, the saddest birthday ever.

Sad moment of Emma's 33rd (see old!) birthday #1: It is currently 12.30am. My phone just rang, something it does not usually do at this time of the day, unless William is in Australia. I see it's my dad calling with my first birthday greeting of the day. Um no. He is calling to see if my brother is still here. So much for being a daddy's girl. It does you no good 30 years later.

Anyway, happy birthday to me!

And if you care, you can see what shameless plug number one is here.

When 11 year olds go mad

There are days when I feel like the 'terrible twos' will never end. The problem is it's not my 2 year old going through them, it's my almost 12 year old. We have been going through this terrible phase of temper tantrums and crying over nothing and everything for, oh, about 10 1/2 years. When will it end?

It's not every day, I'd say that for the last year or so it has been on average once or twice a week. Maybe 3 times. Which is a great improvement over the 6-7 times per week it was before that.

Today's fit was over a voice recognition program we have on our computer. My grandad bought it for Liam last year, it was installed but Liam never has done the inital set up. The fact that he has to read some 50 sentences has him put off. Taylor asked if she could set herself up on it. I said no, it is meant for Liam, he needs to do it.

Well, you'd think I had just told her that I was buying Liam a brand new computer that she was never allowed to use. "Why does Liam get everything and I get nothing!" This from the girl who has so much stuff in her room, I can hardly move in it. I said that the program is meant for Liam so he can use the computer without having to type. Let's face it, it's hard to type something when you can hardly read a word. "It's not my fault I can read!" she says "I hate typing!" Surely, I say, she wouldn't prefer to have dyslexia just so she can get away without typing. Oh, she would. This pissed me off immensely. I freaked. I called her selfish and said I couldn't believe such comments came out of her mouth. She was screaming and crying about how unfair it is that she can read and has to type. And how Liam is treated as though he is special so he gets EVERYTHING and she gets NOTHING.

I ended up saying that if she thinks she really gets nothing then that's how it will be- she can forget about going skiing with her class, about all field trips, birthday parties and Girl Guides. She can do nothing and get nothing as far as I am concerned.

I really don't know what to do about her. For awhile when she was 4 I kept a journal about her tantrums and why she had them as she was supposed to be assessed. I may have to start this again, and it'll be into the blog it goes, since I am not a very good journal keeper. Here's a smaple tantrum from the age of 4 years, 11 months: for playschool, each child is required to bring some sort of fruit for a friendship fruit salad. I have cantaloupe in the fridge so I say she can use that. She freaks out, she wants oranges. She screams and cries and I literally dragged her to school, where she proceeds to be very pleasant but refuses to touch the cantaloupe so the parent helper gives her oranges to peel. And in those days, they were everyday. When she was very little, from 14 months or so, when she had a tantrum she would just fall asleep where she lying screaming. Yesterday Saoirse was going through an album and the first 5 pages contained 6 pictures of Taylor just lying on the floor sleeping with a tear stained face.

Saoirse, thank God, is actually pretty good, just the odd cry when she doesn't get her own way but it ends quickly and then she is fine. Hopefully Sophie will be the same way, I seriously could not handle another Taylor.

Holy crap, it's the middle of December!!!

Are you aware that it is only an hour away from the 14th of December? And that I am totally not ready for Christmas? Do you know how many presents are wrapped and under my tree? Let me enlighten you. One. That's right, ONE. It is the only wrapped present in the entire house. Do you know when I can wrap presents in a child free enviornment? From approximately midnight until 6am. This is generally when I enjoy a little known thing called sleep. At least I try to enjoy it. When a 2 year old kicks you in the back all night and you can't find your ear plugs to drown out the sound of people breathing it is hard to sleep. Yes, I sleep with ear plugs. Because people make noise when they breathe and I like silence. Yet, I can fall asleep with the TV on. Go figure.

Anyway, I am getting a start. Tonight I sorted out the clothes that everyone is getting and I discovered that Sophie only has 3 pairs of pants. So it will be back to Old Navy for me. Liam also needs socks, as does Taylor. I bought two pairs of jeans for him today, they were on sale for $15 each. Taylor is all done as far as clothes go, though I do need to buy her a black skirt for her Christmas concert. They both still need their "big" present, a TV for her and and a TV and DVD player for him. I'm not ripping her off, I already have her DVD player. Just a few movies after that and I am done. I think Taylor may be slightly disappointed, she asked for a snowboard but I didn't really think she was serious and she just mentioned the other day that she didn't want to send in her skiing forms for school until after Christmas because if she gets a snowboard she'd rather do that. Oops. I said "Well, I can tell you you aren't getting a snowboard." Nor is she getting the Oilers jersey she only mentioned this past Saturday. Her birthday is in March so it shouldn't kill her to wait.

I think I'm done until I remember everyone who is not my child. My mum (partially), my aunt and cousin coming from Vancouver, my friends' kids, William. What to get William? He's not a Christmas sort of person. When you ask he says "nothing." Clothes, I've got. I just don't know what else to get him.

Must go to bed, I took an hour and wrapped presents, there are now 10 under the tree. But not a single one for Liam, who I can guarantee will be the one who goes looking to see who has what under there.

Oh, and 2 days till the birthday. I mentioned it briefly today because my brother was supposed to be making a lovely meal for me but instead he is leaving for Calgary that day. Not that he's even in Edmonton yet. Should be here tomorrow, so much for spending my birthday with me!! William hasn't mentioned it, so I'll see what happens on the day. Things better on that front than in the last few days, by the way.

Sometimes I should just shut up

You know, I almost liked things the way they were. Not knowing was better than knowing, I think.

I had a really long post written and I just eeased it. I am not sure how much of my life I can put out there. Details hurt, I realized as I wrote what happened last night. Remembering the exact words in a conversation is horribly painful.

To be quick...after a bit of a fight over Saoirse burning her hand (my fault) and Himself's dinner not being warm (also my fault apparently) I asked what his plans are for when he gets his permanent residency. "What do you mean?" he says. I say does he plan on moving out or what? He wants to stay near Saoirse and Sophie (note to self- does not mention Taylor and Liam), things are not working out between the two of us.

So I guess that's it. I'd still say we need to talk, even if it's just to make arrangements as to how we live together in some semblance of peace over the next 6 or so months. Number one: I do NOT make dinner for my roommates.

The cheesy love songs playlist (aka the longest post I have ever written)

Some of you may have noticed there's been a picture of Lionel Ritchie on my blog for the last few weeks. This is not because I am a fan of Lionel, oh no, not at all, I have been quite frightened of him since the days when the only videos I saw were Friday afternoons when Video Hits was on CBC. My parents, you see, were to cheap to go past channel 13, so there was no Much Music in our house. Even today, my mother only has up to channel 31.

But I digress. The reason I have had Mr. Ritchie's picture gracing (cursing?) my blog is because I, perhaps rather foolishly, joined a cheesy love song CD exchange hosted by Frema. I say foolishly because I am a natural fuck up. The CDs were due to be mailed out to my group last Friday. I have the tendancy to leave everything to the very last minute and this was no different. Thursday night finds me downloading songs. And it's all going very well, until my computer shuts off. And shuts off again and again. I don't know what the hell I did but I can tell you I was extremely happy to see the return of my email today. Anyways, there was no chance of me making the CDs so I called my ex. He was willing to make them for me, so when my kids saw him on Saturday I sent along my playlist, along with a selection of other songs if he couldn't get all the ones I had on CD.

And, blah, he could not. Missing is my all time favourite loved-them-as-a-teenager band, The Jesus and Mary Chain. I was going to use "Sometimes Always", a ballad with Hope Sandoval who was with Mazzy Star at the time. It's not a cheesy song, but it is a love song and JAMC wasn't really known for them. Though Almost Gold was one of my wedding songs. (Along with Afghan Whigs 'True Love Travels on a Gravel Road' and Van Morrison's Moondance, for those who care about that sort of stuff.)

I tried to put in alot of Canadian content. Missing from the final playlist are Michael Buble's Home, Rocket Girl by Doc Walker, Thank You by McMaster and James and Freak Luck by Bob Kemmis "Freak Luck put a car in the way/ I wasn't looking for love but our eyes met/ As I bounced off your Chevrolet."

I ended up with a CD that has 8 Canadian songs out of a total of 18. I don't think most of the songs are cheesy, but cheese is up to each individual I suppose. Most of the songs certainly have a few cheesy lyrics. Almost all of them have some meaning to me and when I hear them I automatically think of a year or a particular person. So here is my list. Canadian artists are starred as such **.

1) Toad the Wet Sprocket- I Will Not Take These Things for Granted. No particular reason, just find it a bit on the sappy side and somewhat depressing.

2) **Jann Arden/ Sarah McLachlan- I Would Die For You. "I've never kissed a sweeter mouth/ I've never been swept away/ It's what dreams are made up of/ Don't you know I could not survive/ Without you in my life/ I would die for you." This is not a cheesy song, but any song that says one couldn't survive without a man/woman in their life deserves a mention. However, if you relate the lyrics to a child it is totally fitting. I would die for my kids and that is it.

3) **Sky- Love Song. One hit wonders. Probably only in Canada at that. And I don't think it was this song, I think it was Some Kinda Wonderful.

4) Modern English- I Melt With You. Entered the realm of cheesiness when used for a hamburger commercial. Was it Burger King? I think it was.

5) **City and Colour. Comin' Home. The first time I heard this song, I cried. It wasn't that long ago and it was these lyrics: "I never thought you could leave me, I figured I was the one." Foolish it is, to figure you are someone's the one. Anyway, I love this guy's voice and this CD is on my Christmas wish list.

6) Cutting Crew- (I Just) Died In Your Arms Tonight. This song totally makes me think of junior high. My friend Sandra was dating this guy Dave and this was their song. Why do I remebmer such things? I have no idea. Probably because I had no one to have a song with in junior high. That had to wait until high school.

7) **The Rankin Family- Fare Thee Well Love. It just is. And just so you know, Jimmy Rankin would totally go on my top 10 celebrities to sleep with.

8) Teenage Fanclub- Guiding Star. I don't think this one is cheesy, in fact, it's Taylor's song. The first verse is written in her baby book. "When everything you own is lost/ And every friendship has its cost/ Your rolling stone has gathered moss/ And all your clouds cover the sun/ And all your karma has undone/ Remember you're my number one/ hey, you're my guiding star/ I do know who you are/ You're my guiding star." For all the problems Taylor and I have, I hope she always knows that she can come to me. When I used to sing her this song as I baby, I used to picture her at around the age she is now. I hope she is a happier teenager than I was, but I doubt it.

9)**Corey Hart. I Am By Your Side. When I was 10 I fell madly in love with Corey Hart. He was my first crush and I wore out the cassette of First Offense. It's a classic album, in my opinion but then I sort of have odd tastes. Jenny Fey, Sunglasses at Night, It Ain't Enough...holy crap, why did I not use It Ain't Enough?? Or Everything in my Heart? I will tell you why. Because I Am By Your Side was on Much More Retro as i was choosing the songs and it is possibly the cheesiest Corey Hart video ever (with the exception of Boy in the Box, void because it is not a love song.) "Boy! Don't you walk away from me! Boy! " and then he drives off on his motorcycle. Cheesy videos at the best. I am sure it must have made Much Music's Fromage list for 1987. Or was it '86? The years blur.

10)**Glass Tiger- Someday. I was rather fond of Glass Tiger back in the day. Again, dates are fuzzy. Somewhere between 85- 87. My brother owned this album and I used to steal it off of him. Bryan Adams did backing vocals on one of the songs. Either this one or I Will Be There. Alan Frew, who was the lead singer, is now on CMT with some American Idol like show. He also did a play in Toronto that my friend's son was in and when she went she told him that I was a big fan (slight exaggeration) and he signed a CD for me. I have yet to listen to it because when you open it there is a picture of him in his bare feet and bare feet totally freak me out. So I have to shut it quickly, no time to take out the CD. I was a little suprised to discover he was a Rangers fan, I suppose I always assume everyone from Glasgow is Celtic fan. only because everyone that I know from Glasgow is actually a Celtic fan. It says it right on the side of the cover RANGERSELFISHANDCHIPSCOTLAND.

11)Spandu Ballet- True.
The German Bastard put this on a mixed tape he made me when we first started dating. It warrants inclusion based solely on that fact alone.

12) **Blue Rodeo- Try. I love this song, it was my first introduction to Blue Rodeo, a band I still love today and have seen live numerous times. Not a cheesy song, but certainly looks at when you look at the linked lyrics.

13) Billy Vera- At This Moment. This is the first -and last- slow song William and I ever danced to.

14) Daniel Bedingfield- If You're Not the One. The lyrics are definitely cheesy, but I do like this song.

15)The Lightning Seeds- Pure. I absolutely love this song and this is one of a very few albums wherre I actually like every single song.

16) Richard Marx- Right Here Waiting. Summer 1989. Everytime I hear this song it brings back memories of that summer. It was "our" song, the German bastard and I. I don't know why, since we were never oceans apart, but I assume it was the song for many couples back then. Looking at the lyrics it suits the first few years of my relationship with William much better, since we really were oceans apart. But it's not our song and neither is At This Moment (the only one we ever danced to if you recall), it is You're the One by Maire Brennan and Shane McGowan from the Circle fo Friends soundtrack.

17) Rick Astley- Together Forever. Another one from the late 80s. I am totally a child of the 80s and when I was in Grade 8 Rick Astley was hugely popular. I never owned a Rick Astley album though. My mother had some sense and never bought one for me.

18) Gordon Lightfoot- If You Could Read My Mind. A Canadian icon. Not really cheesy but included because of the lines "If I could read your mind love/ What a tale your thoughts could tell/ Just like a paperback novel/ The kind the drugstore sells." I was never a fan of him and it was actually a friend from Ireland that sent me a CD with some songs on it. He was a huge fan, he used to fly to Canada to see him. That's dedication. Oh, and wealth. Of which I have neither.

So that's my CD. It is missing a lot of songs that I would have liked to see on it, including these gems: Missing an Angel -Johnny Reid
You'll Never Walk Alone- Gerry and the Pacemakers (opposed for inclusion on my list by William because it is a love song to a daughter, not a love song as per se. Still, if Liverpool can use it as their song, surely I could include it on my CD.)
I Was made For Loving You- KILT
These Things I Believe- Sons of Maxwell
and the cheesiest of all cheesiest songs- Patrick Sawyze's 'She's Like the Wind.' Yes, I own the Dirty Dancing Soundtrack. Not only that one, but the More Dirty Dancing one as well. Taste? Not much.

Calgon, take me away...

Warning! This post contains some bitching!

It's been a bit. I am having massive computer problems, as in the computer is about to go out the window. I was supposed to send off a few CDs last week as I am doing a CD exchange but I could not download a thing. So needless to say, my CDs are late. I still can't upload pictures, and the computer no longer just freezes, it shuts itself off. I have been affected by a massive virus. Hopefully we can swing a new one after Christmas.

Anyway, there have been some shitey days around here. Sophie has been absolutely miserable, even for me. My dad spent two days with us and it seemed as though she did nothing but cry. I am babysitting my friend's 3 year old son all week, which is actually very good because he and Saoirse play so well together. But still, having that extra child throws off the routine.

What else? I am planning a Christmas party for 25 kids between the ages of 2 and 12. With the age difference it's been a bit hard. What games can you play and crafts can you make that will satisfy everyone? None, methinks. And of course, as with every other thing around here, people promise to help you out and do they?? Of course not. My friend was supposed to come over last Saturday and again today and she never bothered to show up. I have gift bags to make up for Santa to hand out, crafts to get ready and games to prepare. I'll be doing it after Sophie goes to bed for the next few nights I guess. But not tonight...totally not in the mood. Tomorrow afternoon, I'll be sending Taylor and her friends over to decorate the office for the party. Oh, crap. That just reminded me that I'll have not only the 3 year old tomorrow afternoon but his 2 sisters. The older one will go with Taylor probably. Actually, the three of them are really good, much better than their cousins who are living hell to babysit.

I woke up feeling so blah today and couldn't figure out why. it wasn't until I realized the date that I got it. Today is the first anniversary of my nan's death, which I wrote about here. I talked to my mum, who was okay with it, feels her mum is happier now as she didn't like being sick, but my aunt in Vancouver (previously the aunt in London if you read that post) had a really bad day. As for me, I have found myself crying over my nan a lot in the last year. I wish I had spent more time with her, and shown more appreciation for the time I did get to spend with her. Except for the 2 weeks in Tenerife when I saw way more of her 68 year old boobs than an 18 year old needs to.

Things still the same with Himself. I must say something soon. I dread when he goes to bed because he just goes on up and hardly even says goodnight. I think that's the time when I'm the saddest. I put off going to bed myself because I hate sleeping next to him knowing that if I even accidentally touch him he will move away. Ach, I'm being pathetic. The whole thing is really. I keep saying that but I do nothing about it. It must be 6 weeks now.

This post is all over the place. I should start again tomorrow when I am in a better frame of mind. Then again, I might not be in a better frame of mind until after this party on Sunday. Of course, by then it'll be only 2 weeks to Christmas and knowing me I will not have sent off my international Christmas cards. I was supposed to make all my own this year but didn't even get around to it, though I did manage to make some beautiful ones for my friend. Plus I haven't wrapped a single gift, have yet to finish shopping for William, along with everyone else who did not spend nine months hanging out in my uterus. Oh and what else? I have spent wayyyyy to much money on Saoirse. Even though I've technically been done her for ages I keep buying more, the last being this last night. I have so much stuff for her that I am going to have to put away some for Easter. The problem is her age you see. At two, they love everything. And she loves her dolls so much, so she'll enjoy this one.

I've gone on again. You know, my posts are way better in my head. I should just think, not write. Course I would then go insane with all the crap running around in there.

Emma vs. the fruit flies

I am at war. And I am losing terribly.

I have had fruit flies before, I usually see them for a couple of weeks in the summer. Get rid of the bananas on the counter and they seem to get bored and go away. I have never had them in the winter before but apparently this is a favourite time for them.

They seem to be breeding in the drains of my kitchen sink and the sinks in two of three bathrooms. Only the kids bathroom has managed to avoid the plague. I find that somewhat strange since the kids bathroom was absolutely disgusting until I cleaned it yesterday and you'd think the fruit flies would have had plenty of things to have lived off of.

Short of removing the pipes, I have tried everything... baking soda and vinegar, vinegar and dishwashing liquid, bleach, raid, draino.... nothing is working. Everytime the taps are tuned on, without fail, a few flies will come flying up through the drain. It completey freaks me out, because I hate bugs every sort. I have told the kids not to leave food out and to always wipe up behind them and to please, please not leave any wet cloths around, because god knows they really love wet cloths. My pleas are falling on deaf ears apparently, because there are constantly crumbs on the counter, unrinsed bowls and plates and half finished glasses of coke.

And so the fruit flies remain. How many do I kill in one day? 20? Maybe more? This cold snap is helping to kill them as well, because everytime they land on a window they seem to freeze. My window sills are getting washed everyday and normally they only get done 4 times a year.

So if anyone has any hints that actually work I would be eternally grateful.

What's happening here

It seems like it's been ages since I actually did a proper post, I've been very lacklustre about everything. With still not being able to download pics onto the computer I haven't really wanted to post about the two girls. It's just not the same without pictures. Because truly, they are freaking adorable. However, if I don't post about them soon this is hardly going to be a blog about my children, which is what it's supposed to be.

So here goes:

Saoirse. Saoirse turned 2 on November 11th and had a Curious George themed party. She was loving all the presents but hardly said a word the entire time. People don's beleive me when I say how much she actually does talk, because the bloody child won't talk around others. When everyone left she did all the running around and talking she didn't do during the party. She's doing great, she was in the 50th percentile for both height and weight at her 2 year check up. The asthma they thought she had will not yet be diagnosed as asthma. We have to see how she does over the winter. Of course, she was healthy at the follow up check up but got the hacking cough again the following Monday and has had it for over 2 weeks now. She will NOT give up the dummy. She will NOT sleep in her own bed. She still loves her dad more than anyone, but Liam is now a very close second. She loves Curious George, any princess movie, Cars and Toy Story. She wears a boys Buzz Lightyear shirt with her princess jeans and Curious George socks. Sigh. A fashionista she is not. She does have a thing for shoes though, which thrills my mum, who loves shoes also. I bought her a pair of hoochie mama boots to wear with capris and skirts and she is too cute in them. She still has no interest in doing the alphabet or colours with me but sometimes I hear her saying letters to herself. She does her numbers no problem, so I don't know why she won't do the others. She's a slightly difficult child when she wants to be.

Sophie. It's hard to believe she is almost 4 months old. She's huge compared to what Saoirse was at the same age, and has been in her 6-12 month outfits since just before 3 months. Her 4 month shots are next week, so I'll see where she is at on the percentile chart. She is very vocal and talks non stop. She started laughing a few weeks ago and today Liam got a full belly laugh out of her which was so lovely to hear. He was not so thrilled when she grabbed his hair though and wouldn't let go. A sign he needs to cut it I think. She can also pull herself up into a sitting position. She is freaking strong! She stands for ages just holding my fingers and in the last few days has tried taking steps. I think she'll be an early walker, which makes me sort of sad. She absolutely will not be alone with her dad. I can't even put away laundry without her crying. I can't leave my house without her screaming the entire time she is gone. She has given William a bit of a complex. She is pretty much exclusively breastfed, just the occassional bottle of formula if I do actually go out.

Taylor. Still driving me mad. Her report card came home last Friday and was pretty terrible. Some A's, plenty of B's, some C's and a whole lot of "does not apply effort." She has been telling me she completes her work in class, but is obviously lying as she did not complete 2 of 3 major language arts projects. I'm meeting her teacher tomorrow. I have a few questions, one being what are they doing with the funding they are receiving for her because it is certainly not being used on her. Last year I was told that once you are coded it follows you through the rest of your school days. So then should the funding. I am not saying she deserves to be in a gifted program, far from it. I do think she needs some help though, even with organization skills. Believe me, she isn't going to learn them with me. I am going to enrol her in a couple of courses in the spring, one on how to study and one on organization. She'll suffer come Grade 7 and already her marks will keep her out of the IB program. Exciting stuff for her yesterday, on their way back from a field trip to City Hall they were hit by a car. No one was hurt, but they spent 2 hours sitting on a bus in -31 weather. I was at the school because I was supposed to meet with her teacher that day. If I hadn't of been I never would have heard about it because the school did NOT notify me. I think they only called the parents of kids who normally take the bus. She didn't mind the accident at all as she got to find out the age of her teacher when the police were on the bus. The things that are important when you are 11.

Liam. Liam's Liam. He's addicted to some computer game and I have had to ban him as he will not bother reading or anything. He is in dire need of a hair cut, it is past his shoulders. He is refusing so I may have to take the drastic step of cutting it in his sleep, doing such a bad job he is forced to go to the hairdresser. The problem with this plan is that I don't think he really looks in the mirror very carefully so mightn't notice uneven hair over his head and will then walk around like that for weeks.

The fall TV schedule. What the hell happened to Justice, the Nine and Six Degrees?? I watch way to much TV. Sundays and Thursdays are the worst (I have to record on those nights too) and I wish they would spread some of the love to Tuesdays and Wednesdays.

Everything else. This Thursday it will be 4 weeks since the big fight. No idea what's going on. Am afraid to approach the subject and ruin the odd sort of peacefulness that prevails. I did say "...as much as I love you..." the other day and then said "Oops! I forgot." He didn't say anything though. Saoirse no longer gives kisses at night and I did say under my breath "Just like her dad." He said what and I said nothing, just talking to myself.

So odd.

A Christmas Meme

I know I just did a meme! Stop your grumbling! I got this one in an email the other day and because it's a Christmas one I had to do it. And what an easy post, all I had to do was cut and paste.

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate..... Hot chocolate, preferably white from Second Cup with whipping cream. Egg Nog? Yuck.
2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? He wraps them of course. I've never figured out what the point is in coming down the stairs to see exactly what you got. Santa also puts the presents all around the tree, not just in the front.
3. Coloured lights on tree/house or white.... Coloured.
4. Do you hang mistletoe? No, I've never seen it here.
5. When do you put your decorations out? I start November 1st. My tree usually goes up the last weekend in November but hasn't this year, because I wanted to wait for the new sofa. The sofa's not arriving until Dec 12 but I can no longer wait for the tree. It's going up on Saturday.
6. What is your favourite holiday dish (excluding dessert)? I love stuffing.
7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child: Sledding with my brother and cousins, my dad and my uncle. Playing games on Christmas night. We still do both. There's no cousins now though.
8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? Huh? What's that about Santa?
9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? The kids do. Every year they get pjs. Sometimes they will get something else as well, always with a Christmas theme...a book or a movie. When I was a child we would sometimes have a visit from Santa on Christmas Eve and would get something small. I recall a Garfield address book. Santa was often slightly drunk on Christmas Eve and spoke with a thick Ballymena accent.
10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? With a mixture of the kids school made ornaments, Hallmark ones, and every year the kids get an ornament that represents something they have liked this year. Taylor's getting a Spongebob one (same as last year), Saoirse's getting Cookie Monster ( I bought it before she fell in love with Curious George and Cinderella.) Sophie will get a first Christmas ornament and I'm not sure about Liam yet.
11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? There's too much of it right now and I am NOT liking it. I want it for Christmas day because we go sledding.
12. Can you ice skate? Have you ever fallen on the ice? Sorta. Yes, with skates on and without.
13. Do you remember your favourite gift? Well, I'm a bit excited about the DVD boxsets I am getting this year (Facts of Life and How I Met Your Mother) but if I had to go into the past it would be an Eddie Bauer coat from the year they were really popular. Because I always searched for presents I pretty much knew everything I was getting. I desperately wanted this coat and my mum did the whole "I'm already finished shopping...it's too expensive" routine. So when I opened that I was truly surprised for the first time in years. She pulled it off again the next year when she bought me a vacuum. Seriously, a vaccum. I was only 18! She also got me an electric cheese grater that year, which I still have and is the handiest thing ever.
14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Being with my family.
15. What is your favourite Holiday Dessert? My mum's rumballs.
16. What is your favourite holiday tradition? Watching Christmas movies.
17. What tops your tree? An angel, dressed in blue and silver.
18. Which do you prefer... giving or Receiving? Giving, which you would never have guessed based upon the 2 page Christmas list I used to give my mother every year. I used to eagerly anticipate the Sears Wish Book. Now I look forward to it so I can see what I can get the kids.
19. What is your favorite Christmas Song? Silent Night and Little Drummer Boy for traditional. Mary's Boy Child and Silver Bells for non traditional. There's not a bad Christmas song out I don't think.
20. Candy Canes? Love them. Who doesn't appreciate a good stick of pure sugar?

A second alphabet meme

Yes, it's true. My love for these knows no bounds. Thanks, Boliath!

A - Available/Single? I'll say no. though Himself may have other ideas. I'm becoming very blase about the whole thing.

B - Best Friend? More a few close friends. I probably tell Shelley the most and am closest to her.

C- Cake or Pie? It depends. I would choose Boston Cream Pie over Black Forest cake but a regular birthday cake over lemon meringue pie.

D - Drink Of Choice? Tea.

E - Essential Item You Use Everyday? God, probably the TV as pathetic as that is.

F - Favorite Color? Green or blue.

G - Gummy Bears Or Worms? Bears. I can't eat the worms or any insect-like ones. I would totally fail the eating live bugs challenge on Survivor.

H - Hometown? Birmingham, England.

I - Indulgence? Purchasing Stampin' Up supplies.

J - January Or February? January is too depressing because Christmas is over. Even though Febrauary is the coldest month of the year here it does contain Liam's birthday and is one month closer to spring.

K - Kids & Their Names? 4- Taylor, Liam, Saoirse and Sophie.

L - Life Is Incomplete Without? My kids, even the chancers.

M - Marriage Date? To the ex- January 29. 1994. Don't forsee one happening with William.

N- Number Of Siblings? 1. My brother Thom, who's coming home for my birthday before he goes off to England for Christmas and Paris for New Years, the lucky bastard.

O - Oranges Or Apples? Mandarin oranges.

P - Phobias/Fears? Spiders, coming down from heights.

Q - Favorite Quote? I can't be arsed to make sure I'm quoting exactly but the jist is 'One day he'll do great things for Ireland' and it would be Michael Collins' father talking about his son. I have it correctly somewhere in this blog, but it's 1am and the baby is only half asleep so it ain't happening today.

R - Reason to Smile? The aforementioned baby lying in my arms. Plus the other 3.

S - Season? Autumn.

T - Tag Three People? Unlike myself, most people hate these so I won't tag anyone but I hope, as I always do because I love to know all sorts of useless shite like whether you prefer cake or pie, that a few people do this.

U - Unknown Fact About Me? What would you like to know? I'll tell all. I have no boundaries, odd for someone so shy. Hmmm... i'm supposed to wear glasses, but haven't in almost a year.

V - Vegetable you don't like? Most of them...peas, corn, brussel sprouts, cauliflower. Terrible mother story- when I was 5 I absolutely loved mashed potatoes. I came home from kindergarten one day and my mum had made me a plate of mashed potatoes for lunch and when I was almost finished she said 'You just ate cauliflower.' Of course, I could eat no more. For the last 25+ years, that (probably) small plate of mashed potatoes has become a giant, heaping plate of cauliflower in my mind. I mentioned this to my mum recently and she laughed and said it was mashed potatoes mixed with a bit of cauliflower. She did it because I hadn't touched a vegetable other than potatoes or raw carrots in 2 years, not since we had left England.

W - Worst Habit? Spending money. But I love it. Today I bought a TV bench and 2 endtables, along with assorted another things.

X - X-rays You've Had? Elbow. Possibly chest too.

Y - Your Favorite Food? Souvlaki. For now anyway.

Z - Zodiac Sign? Saggitarius.

Alberta, I worry about you

You can look at this first ballot in the election for a new leader of the Conservative party in one of three ways.

1) Holy fuck! There are a lot of rednecks in this province to actually allow the exremely right wing, way too socially conservative man to come in second in this race, with less than 4000 votes between him and front runner Jim Dinning.

2) Hmmm...Morton becoming premier could in the next election force small c Conservatives to vote Liberal along with all those left leaving voters who think "Finally, we have a chance!" and all the NDPers (of which there aren't many in this province) who realize the NDP will never have seats outside the city of Edmonton.

3) The reality is probably that the majority of the candidates who did not place in the top 3 will give their support to third place Ed Stelmach and he may very well beat both Morton and Dinning.

Sigh. There's no pleasing some of us. But I will take pleasure in the fact that that smug bastard Mark Norris came in sixth of eight. If I could remember who told me the story about him coming on to a massage therapist I would post it here. Damn my bad memory.

Damn you Costco for making me spend so much money

I have been to Costco twice in the last two days. I really love Costco. But I kind of hate it too. It is impossible to leave Costco without spending less than $100. Well, I did see some lady leaving today with just chicken breasts, but she was obviously crazy and does not understand the fact that if you have to pay for a membership to shop in a store it is a requirement of said membership that you leave the store with a cart load of stuff you probably don't really need.

Yesterday I went to buy a lot of things and this I did to the tune of $448.34. I needed meat which is always pricey. I bought one of Liam's two big Christmas gifts. I bought Saoirse 2 Disney storybooks (suddenly the child is in love with the princesses. How does this happen?) and Sophie a board book box set. Both for Christmas. I found beautiful frames for the girls' portraits. I bought more food.
It was a good shopping trip.

I didn't really need to go today but my friend Andi did and since I have the card I had to go. So I thought I'd pick up a few things, one of them being another set of frames for Taylor and Liam's school pictures. After all, why should Saoirse and Sophie have beautiful frames and Taylor and Liam get stuck with the cheapo Walmart ones? I walked out of there with my bank account down an extra $277. Thank God I get paid again tomorrow. Oooohhh and best of all, I bought myself a gift from my Christmas list. The Facts of Life Seasons 1 and 2 was only $20, a full $10 cheaper than HMV. I don't know how I missed it yesterday, it was right behind the DVD for the Flying Nun which I looked directly at. Now I just have to decide if I should open it now, or have the kids give it to me for either my birthday or Christmas.

Tomorrow I am off to Walmart for Liam's other big gift (a TV and DVD player), an Oilers shirt for Taylor and some odds and ends for the house, to the Dollar Store for my Disney Christmas gift bags and to Ticketmaster to pick up the tickets to the Oilers/Carolina game for William and Liam.

Do you sense that I may have a small problem with spending? I'd like to say it's just a Christmas thing, but it's not.

November 20, 1986

I'm copying off of Boliath today, and it's not even because I don't have anything to write about. I actually do. The cheesy love song CD exchange I am involved in for one, I could even write about the fight I had with William last night but I don't think I should bother!

So Boliath asks where were you on November 20, 1986?

I was 12, and that probably doesn't make for the most interesting post. It was a Thursday, so I was in school. Grade 8. Thursday's were early days, always a great thing in my books. I'm sure I had the basics...Language Arts, Social, Science, French and Math. I dreaded Math. Mrs. Penn was well past retirement age and acted like it. Her hair was dyed black and was in a very 1950s style. She wore a ton of black eyeliner and jangly bracelets. To this day, I hate jangly bracelets. Blame it on Mrs. Penn.

I had a huge crush on a ninth grader called Colin, but the furthest it ever went was a few notes and the odd phone call. He was short and Italian and I looooved him. In the way that only 12 year olds can, of course. I just did an internet search (very stalkerish isn't it?) on him and am a tad surprised to see he plays ball hockey. Wouldn't have thunk it.

The only thing I specifically remember about my eighth grade education is doing a radio play in L.A. and writing a report on whether I was pro or anti death penalty. (I was one of 2 that were for it. Today I am pretty much against it.) It's odd that I can recall conversations with people, almost word for word, but I can't remember what books we had to read or what we studied in Social. I remember a guy called Dwayne who used to blow his nose on what he called a snot rag. I am sure I used to look at him with all the 12 year old disdain I could muster. I remember going to the store at lunch for fries and gravy if we had the money and if not we would go to the bakery for a 35 cent cinnamon bun. I remember the girls I hung around with, only one of whom I have kept in contact with.

It's funny what some of the kids I went to school with grew up to become...one is a millionaire because he started an online dating service, one is rumoured to be a pimp (and you just knew he would be, his name was Marlon after all) and 2 are/ were strippers (one male, one female.) It's amazing how many jobs can be related to sex. Hmmm...though I suppose pimping is not really a job. I suppose the majority of those students went on to become mums and dads with average jobs and everyday lives. Except for the one that made it to the NHL.

Sometimes I miss those junior high days. Though I'd never actually go back. God forbid.

How did I miss this one?

Surely by now you all know of my love of questionnaires and quizzes and anything meme-related. I don't know how I missed this one over at Eric's blog. All I can say is I have been a bad blog reader.

Are you:

A cuddler? For about 5 minutes and then I like my own space. I sleep as close to the edge of the bed as possible and that's even when things are good.
A morning person? No. But once I'm up I'm usually okay. If getting myself and two babies dressed by 1pm is considered okay.
Are you a perfectionist? Not at all.
An only child? No. I have a brother, Thom.
Catholic: Why yes I am. Is this an issue?
In your pajamas? No, jeans.
Currently suffering from a broken heart? Sorta kinda.
Okay styling other people's hair? No, in fact of the three daughters I have, one does not have enough hair yet, one unfixes what ever I do and the oldest flat out refuses my very kind offers of any sort of style at all.
Left handed? Yes. I live in a mostly left handed house. William, Taylor and I are all southpaws. Saoirse seems to be leaning to the left (just like she had better politically in 16 years.) My mother and my great grandfather are also left handed. Well, he was. He's been dead for many a year.
Addicted to MySpace? Fuck no. I'm well over 15.
Shy around the opposite gender? Always have been. Get over it already, she says to herself.
Loud? When I'm mad.

Do you:

Bite your nails? Yes. A bad habit passed on to two of my daughters.
Get paranoid at times? Not usually.
Currently regret something that you have said/done? No.
Curse frequently when you get mad? Yes, but not like William, for whom fuck is a verb, noun and adjective.
Enjoy country music? It's quite alright. I do love the Dixie Chicks, but that might be more for their politics than their music, which isn't really all that country sounding these days.
Enjoy jazz music? It's alright. But it's not like I'd run out and buy a CD.
Enjoy smoothies? Yes. But not enough to pay $4 for one.
Enjoy talking on the phone? Oh, I love it.
Have a lot to learn? It appears to be so.
Have a pet? No. 4 kids are more than enough.
Have a tendency to fall for the "wrong" person? It appears as though this is true.
Have all your grandparents died? No, my mum's dad is alive and well in Weston super Mare.
Have at least one sibling? Just the aforementioned brother.
Have been told that you are smart? Yes. And that I didn't live up to my full potential, blah, blah, blah.
Have had a broken bone? Just a chipped elbow.
Have Caller I.D. on your phone? One one of them, but not the other. So if I am upstairs I don't know who is calling and it sometimes stresses me out.

Have you:

Changed a diaper? Daily.
Changed a lot over the past year? Yes. I am no longer pregnant. I am losing weight.
Had friends who have never seen your natural hair color? My hair is it's natural colour. It just keeps getting darker and darker and I fully expect to wake up one morning with brown hair.
Had surgery? 2 c-sections and a D&C.
Killed anyone? A kitten. By accident.
Had your haircut within the last week? It was ages ago.

Last person who:

Slept in the bed beside you? Sophie. We had a wee nap this morning.
Saw you cry? William.
Went to the movies with you? It was just after Sophie was born. I think it was all of us except for Liam. We saw Cars and it was Saoirse's first movie in a theatre. She lasted until the last 10 minutes.
You went to the mall with? Saoirse and Sophie.
You went to dinner with? Shelley? I can't remember.
You talked to on the phone? Shelley.
Said 'I love you' to you and meant it? Holy fuck. Normally it would be William, but it's day 13 of the cold shoulder. Taylor or Liam. Saoirse won't say it, the little bugger.
Broke your heart? That would be Himself of course.
Made you laugh? Saoirse.

Would you rather?

Pierce your nose or tongue? Neither.
Be serious or be funny? Funny. Which I'm not I know.
Drink whole or skim milk? Whole if I was forced. Skim looks like white water.
Die in a fire or drown? Two of my worst death fears. I can't choose, just the thought freaks me out.
Spend time with your parents or enemies? My parents in a room together would quickly become my enemies.

About you!

What time is it? 12.34 am
Name? Emma
Nickname(s)? None in years.
Where were you born? Sutton Coldfield, England. How many thousands of times can I answer that question.
What is your birthdate? December 16. Hey, a month today.
What do you want? Happy, content and well adjusted children. Considering the circumstances, its not going too badly.
Where do you want to live? I always say Ireland but I suppose if it came right down to it I'd stay in Canada. I'd love to live in Newfoundland or Nova Scotia.
How many kids do you want? Just the ones I have, thanks.