Talking About the Birds and the Bees

Last night, Liam and I were watching a program (it was child friendly) and it said something about the "abstinence club." I had hoped that the reference went right over Liam's head, as I was not up for a talk on sexuality yesterday, but immediately he piped up with "What's abstinence?

Very foolishly, because the show was about teenagers, I said "It is what teenagers who choose not to have sex are practising." I was about to correct myself and say people instead of teenagers and I thought that would be that when I heard the dreaded question...

"How old were you when you first had sex?"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you say to that? I think that I have always been very open with my children, they have always known that to have a baby a man and a woman have sex. They know it's okay if they are gay or straight, although Liam says it would be gross for men to kiss each other (but come on, he's 9, he thinks girls and guys kissing is ucky,)they also have been told that can ask me anything. But for some reason I was not expecting that one. So what did I do? I hemmed and hawed and avoided the question. I answered a question that he didn't even ask. I told him how old I was when I had my first proper boyfriend.

I look at the teenagers in my neighbourhood and I think that not one of them is old enough or mature enough to be having sex. I am sure they think they are and are acting on it. And I also know now that I was not mature enough all those many years ago. I don't think that I would go back and change anything, after all my mistakes have made me somewhat smarter, but I would hope that my children don't rush into sexual relationships. Because, frankly, I don't think their mother could handle it.